Confirmation

Most people who know me, know that about a year ago I made the decision to go into ministry. Now I'm a biblical studies major pursing some sort of ministry in the future. Making this decision last year was one of the hardest times of my life. So many emotions and thoughts filled my head. I questioned how God could possibly use a simpleton like me. I wondered if I had simply imagined my call.  But over everything else I was scared. At first I was just scared to tell people. I wondered what they would think of me. Would they call me a Jesus freak, would they assume I was going to judge them for everything they did.  I was scared to tell my parents. I was scared they would think I was making a mistake and ruining my future. I was scared because I'm a girl. I had all these fears of what others would think. 

With all that said, making the decision to go into ministry has lead me to by far the best experiences of my life. I was blessed to intern at an amazing church and receive guidance from an incredible youth leader. I was able to speak at a soup kitchen church service. The various opportunities/people that have come my way since then have been incredible. However in the back of my mind I still couldn't shake the feeling that I wasn't good enough to be in ministry or that it wasn't God's plan for me. 

Since being on campus, almost all of my doubts and fears have washed away. A couple factors have played into my confirmation. The first being the Bible study I joined last week. We're going over the book Multiply by Francis Chan. It's all about being and making disciples. I can't really pick out anything in particular from the study that really spoke to me, but just being in a group of girls that are devoting themselves to Christ and to making disciples gives me so much joy that I feel like it's just one way of God confirming me. It reminded me of the passion I have for Christ. Like yes, ministry is what I'm suppose to do. (Sorry I'm doing such a bad at explaining the feeling I have but it's just such a good feeling and gives me so much peace for the future that I'm not even worrying at all anymore.)

The second way God has kinda confirmed me is by being on a Christian campus. This is going to sound weird but it's like I miss non-Christians. I had somehow gotten in the mindset where I wanted to talk to non believers. This summer especially increased that in me, between talking to the people on the trains in Chicago and going around the city talking to random people. Everyone's story is so unique and it's a fun challenge to try to form relationships and bring them to Christ. Here (Spring Arbor) most people are already Christians that I'm lacking having those encounters and I've found myself wanting them. That just really confirms in me that ministry is where my heart is at and I am on the right path. 

I can't say that I'm not a little nervous for the future, because I am. But it's a good kind of nervous. I can't wait to see where God leads me. Tonight at the Bible study we talked about Jesus's resurrection and how when the women saw the tomb was empty they left "afraid but filled with joy" and that's exactly how I feel. Afraid of what the future may hold, but so joyful that it's in God's hands. And I know that just like in this passage God will meet me where I am and be my savior I so desperately need. 

So the women hurried away from the tomb, afraid yet filled with joy, and ran to tell his disciples. 9 Suddenly Jesus met them. “Greetings,” he said. They came to him, clasped his feet and worshiped him. 10 Then Jesus said to them, “Do not be afraid.”

10 things I love about Spring Arbor (so far)

Classes started two weeks ago and since then I've been super busy and finding a time to write has been pretty difficult, but it seems like so much has happened that I need to share at least something now! So here it is, the top ten things I have come to love about Spring Arbor so far this year. 

(In no particular order) 

1.) My soccer team! I can't even begin to describe how much everyone means to me. They push me on and off the field to become a better person and are just so caring and helpful. I also have an amazing freshman group of girls and I'm so happy how close all of us are, they are just amazing! 

2.) The opportunities on campus to get involved in. It seems like every day there is some fun activity or Bible study or meet and greets going on on campus. Intramurals have already started, I've joined a Bible study, every weekend there's been something going on like a movie or block party. It's just been a fun atmosphere to be a part of. 

3.) Chapel! Our chapel is sooo good and I just look forward to it every Monday and Wednesday. Our worship team is incredible, the speakers so far have been great and it's just so awesome to have everyone come together and just worship our Lord! 

4.) Small class sizes. None of my classes have over 30 students and I love that because it creates a much more relaxed setting and I feel like I actually can get to know my professors, and my professors get to know me, which is  a good thing since I'm missing so many classes for soccer, I can actually go up and talk to them about my assignments. 

5.) The kind humans around campus. Everywhere you go people are so friendly and nice. You can't walk through a doorway near a guy without them opening the door for you. You can just tell people here are genuine. 

6.) Core. Core100 is basically a class to help you get adjusted to college but also helps you to learn about yourself and your core class. It's kinda like a youth group in a way, but I love my core. (It helps that 8 of the 11 girls are on the soccer team) We go on a camping trip this weekend and I'm looking forward to it. 

7.) The scooter crew! I've lost my scooter twice already, once it was stolen by the guys soccer team, the other time I thought I had actually lost it because I just left it in the lobby of one of the dorms but luckily the crew has my back and had put it in one of the rooms so me and my scooter are reunited again. (And the roads have just been repaved around campus so riding is much more fun now) 

8.) The desserts at meal. Enough said, our desserts are amazing. 

9.) The clock tower, which may seem like a weird one, but the other day I heard it playing the song "My favorite things" from the Sound of Music and it just totally made my day! I love that song and I didn't even know the bell tower could do that. 

10.) The Holy Spirit's presence on campus. It's so nice to be at a school where I know that both students and professors have my best interest in mind and where everyone is striving to get to know God and glorify Him and I just can't wait to see what the rest of the year will bring because this school has so much to offer and I'm just so happy to be here!